So, on Thursday Ava went to her first dance class. The teacher bent the rules a bit, as the students are supposed to be 3—this was a trial run to see if Ava could handle it. Could she handle it?? Are you kidding? She has been waiting for this her whole life! Anyway, we get there huffing and puffing as it is the top floor of a 3 story building, Carter was in the backpack, and Ava decided that she needed to be carried up the stairs which were “a little bit tough,” and join our fellow dancers in the changing area—2 other kids, both close to 4. Ava was a bit intimidated, but ran like the dickens when one of them said “come on Ava!” (this was Sylvie, a friend from Little Dippers, who is now in preschool and thus a goddess to Ava). So, she goes into the studio, and I follow with Carter and the 2 girls are sitting around the teacher and Ava marches right into their midst and plunks herself down directly in front of the teacher, about oh, 5 inches from her, and looks up at her like “I’m here! What are we gonna do? Mom? Who’s mom?” The other girls were a bit like “who exactly does she think she is?” Fortunately they knew the little kid routine and were blessedly indulgent. I chat a bit with Leanne, and then go to the sidelines. So, they get started. First they form a circle, and SHE LOOKED SOOOO CUTE! She had on a green shirt and pink leggingish pants and a pink tutu that just underscored how little she was compared to the other kids. I am so used to seeing her with her peers that I was oblivious to how little she is. She was about 8 inches shorter, and just petite all around, comparatively. So, there they are and she is looking up at the teacher with these huge eyes and gaping mouth, so ready to absorb whatever is going to come out of this woman’s mouth—and don’t you know it, they start with “if you’re happy and you know it.” She looked over at me with an expression that basically said “I am going to absolutely die of excitement right now!” But true to her Ava nature, she just watched open mouthed for the first little bit, then slowly decided to clap her hands. Then they had to stop their feet—she carefully stepped, always looking at the others to see if it was right. Then they had to really dance—jumping and twirling and twisting—and she finally let loose all of her excitement and totally exploded in a frenzy of movement with this huge smile plastered on her face and she was running and jumping and twirling and all the while watching herself in the mirror or the teacher. Then they got to be animals. They had to line up and were supposed to basically do follow the leader, but this was hard for her—she kept treating it as a race and would run to the front, so she could be next to the teacher. First they were penguins, then they were cats. The cats were a huge hit, the penguins a bit harder. Then they were something that skipped. Ava is a huge fan of skipping, though she can’t do it—she gallops instead—so she galloped all over the room in pure joy. Then they were ostriches. This caused me some worry, as I thought she would fall on her head, but she was ok. Then they played “late last night” which is a song about someone sneaking different shoes on one’s feet, and then the kids roleplay (rollerskates, flip flops, hiking boots, spaceboots, etc). Then the hard part started, where Leanne lined them up and went through the 5 ballet positions. Ava’s kinesthetic awareness is limited still—it is hard to tell her to put her heels together and her toes apart without her heels coming apart too. But she tried, though she did come over to me a couple of times. And finally the last dance—the butterfly dance. The prep work for this was long, and Leanne lost Ava’s attention. She just did not want to be in her chrysalis. When Leanne asked Ava what color her wings were going to be, Ava said “like this” and started wiggling her fingers. This was confusing to Leanne, and then Ava said “I have hair clips in.” Uh-huh. She was so spent, I think she totally forgot what was going on. The other girls were looking at her like, get on with it! Leanne rallied and said your butterfly can be skin colored(basing this on the wiggling fingers), and Ava was in agreement. But as soon as the butterfly started flying, Ava was all over it. Class ended and we were invited back, so we were all happy. We got into the car though and Ava clearly was exhausted.

I have to admit it, I was teary watching her—she was so cute, bouncing along, and her excitement was so palpable, and she was so little.

Today we went to St. Lawrence University’s equestrian center. It was neat for Ava, and has some potential as a riding opportunity in the future, but it was a lot of driving for an hour of scratching a horse. Carter was totally blown away. I think he was just astonished that dogs could get that big. He has just figured Rose out, and I don’t think he has any idea that there are other animals. He knows Rose’s name, which is neat. If we say ‘where’s Rose?’ he will look in her direction. He also has object permanence down—if something falls past his line of vision, he will look over the edge of his seat for it. And if Ava is hiding behind the shower curtain, he knows she is there, and he will totally crack up when she pops out at him (yes, we all go to the bathroom together. I am so looking forward to a visit by myself 10 years from now). And he does his own peekaboo with the bath towel, like he did the other day—he grabs the edge and yanks it up over his face and back down really fast and laughs and laughs. I put him on the floor today and he showed real initiative in movement. No tremendous success, but at least he is getting the idea. It helps to put a zweibeck out of reach. He is very capable of moving himself all over the floor in a series of rolls and twists, but sitting up is still beyond him. But put something he wants close to him and he will move heaven and earth to get it. He is very very vehement in his reaching. Absolutely determined—mouth agapes, eyes wide, feet kicking like crazy. And he will push you away if you are preventing the goal too. It is weird—he just seems like he made this huge leap in the past week. He totally imitates movement—Ava was patting him, and he reached over and patted her. Exactly the same way. He also can make a clicking sound and make raspberries. That is not earth shattering, but fun all the same. But boy can he wail. As soon as he wants Mom, and realizes I am not there, look out. And it is so heartwrenching. It is a scream/sob type thing, which is so uncharacteristic of him, I always pause and wonder if he is hurt.

Speaking of screams, Ava had a full blown tantrum this evening. She had a corn toastie (an aside, Thomas’ changed the formula and they are positively disgusting now), and did not like it, so I asked her “Ava, do you want any more of this?” “No.” “Are you sure? Because I am going to give it to Rose.” “Yes.” “OK.” Oh, BIG mistake. Granted, I knew it might be, but I am a bit tired of the no, I don’t want it, yes I do routine. So Rose ate it. And then the screaming started. You would have thought that I had fed Rose the body and blood of Christ. She lost her mind. Nothing would help, she just stood there in tears, screaming through clenched teeth, and then running over to Rose, falling to her knees, arms outstretched, saying “please give me back my corn toastie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Clearly it was a vehicle for all of the days accumulated stress, but my god. I just went about my business, hugging her when she wanted one, and otherwise ignoring her. Just when I thought it had ended, I would try to introduce logic, and it would start up again, so I gave up and put the teletubbies web site on, and let her decide to join in the fun when she was ready. Meanwhile, Carter has somehow managed to fall asleep in my arms. Unbelievable. Eventually it ended, and we explored the pbskids.org website a bit and out of the blue, at 7 PM she announce she was ready for bed. My total anal retentiveness regarding their sleep does actually pay off sometimes. If I can say anything, it is that I will move heaven and earth to make sure they get adequate sleep. Barring tranquilizers of course.