the best thing about carter these days is this funny little excited run/walk that he does--he bends his knees, tips forward a bit at the hips, balls his fists and sticks his elbows out, then run/walks while twisting his torso and chicken arms in opposite directions. i have no idea if that conveys it, but it is even funnier when he has two balloons on strings in his fists. and he sort of juts out his lower jaw in a determined/i am big and tough sort of a way.

and this is what i have learned: unlike ava, if you ignore his tantrums, after 5 minutes or so, he gives up and either walks away or he does what has been requested of him. ava? no way. ever since day 1, she could outlast anyone. her endurance is phenomenal, and so we learned to capitulate pretty quickly. crib? no? ok. bottle? no? ok. shoes? no? ok. but with carter, if there is really a strong reason why i am saying no, say for example i am draining spaghetti and cannot hold him, he just wails for a minute or so, then moves on. tonight, he wanted to feed himself hummus. at any other point in the day, i would have said ok. but he had just had his bath, and i had just finished cleaning up the disaster that was the remains of our taco dinner (note: this is not a good dinner for a 2 year old and a 4 year old if you do not want refried beans EVERYWHERE--but they did eat it, which is the primary objective). so i put my foot down. mommy had to feed him with the spoon. mommy needs control. he was devastated. so i calmly said no and i put the hummus on the counter. a few more back and forths, with him pointing to himself and crying, and me repeating "you can have hummus, but i have to feed it to you" (ava LOVED this exchange--mom was putting her foot down with carter), and then suddenly, as quickly as it began, he stopped and pointed to me, and said "mommy." i said "you want me to feed you?" and then he nodded and said "pea?" which is please. and we had hummus. peacefully.

and he pretends now. he loves to pretend to eat--he makes all sorts of concoctions and brings these invisible goodies to me. it is pretty neat.