with the exception of the time it was on in the ER when carter was 2.5 years old and getting sutures, the kids have never watched spongebob. ever. i have a thing about spongebob, though i am not sure what, because i have never watched it either. it has something to do with media and consumerism and marketing and well, frankly, the aesthetics of it all. i just don't like the way spongebob looks i guess.
anyway, there are enough mommy-sanctioned shows on tv that i do not feel in the least like i am depriving my kids, even when their peers look at them oddly when they admit to not knowing that sponge bob or hanna montana (another rant entirely) are actually tv shows.
so, imagine my surprise when carter made a beeline for the spongebob fruit snacks in the grocery store. now i also hate fruit snacks, though with a grudging appreciation for their usefullness. they represent a confluence of literally all the things i can't stand about kid-culture: tv, sugar (or really high fructose corn syrup), loads of other ridiculous ingredients, deceptive marketing (fruit? how many times do i have to explain to the kids that they are NOT fruit???), industrial food--and so on.
but did he go for the diego fruit snacks? the spiderman fruit snacks? scooby snacks?? oh, no. he went for the manic yellow sponge. and THEN he had to sing, at the top of his lungs:
"sponge BOB! i love sponge BOB! spuuuuuuuunnnnge Ba a a a a a a a aaaaaaB! SPONGE BOB!!!"
oh my god.
for me to say "but carter, you don't even watch sponge bob!" would have technically been true, but it would have sounded like a mother trying to cover up her parenting lapses. so, i let it slide, and threw the box in the cart only to put it back on the shelf next to the triscuits when carter wasn't looking.
i am just floored by the power of that god forsaken sponge. and i am starting to grasp that unless we move to namibia, he is going to win. which really ticks me off.
Thursday, May 21, 2009
carter and i were walking home from dropping ava off at school, and he looked at me and said "mommy, remember the dream i had when you were driving the boat and i told you to push the throttle forward and you pulled it backwards and we started going backwards and then you pushed it really fast forwards and then we went really really fast and then we went so fast we flew into the sky?"
now this dream is very interesting for a few reasons: first, he assumes that if he dreamt it, i have access to it in my head. obviously he is still working under the assumption that what he thinks i think. or, to put it more bluntly, that i can read his mind. this explains a lot.
second, i NEVER drive the boat. i am glad to hear that at least carter has the confidence in me to trust me with the controls.
third, wow, what a dream!
so then i asked him if he had other dreams that he remembered. "oh, yes! i have lots of dreams" he said. ava never shares her dreams, and i get the impression that although she keeps up a running audible commentary throughout the night, she does not ever remember her dreams. carter went on to tell me about the dragon in the cottage, but it was a baby dragon, otherwise it never would have fit in the cottage, as well as a really scary dream about an old man that was finished living in his body (an expression i have used when he asked me about dying), that could not die and underwent a particularly harrowing series of attempts at death. this one stopped me in my tracks because carter is so carefree and happy that it is very hard to imagine him having such an intense existential dream. there were a couple others that i cannot recall right now, but the entire conversation was very illuminating.
on saturday we all went to the movies for the fist time. the kids have been to several IMAX films, but never a feature length--the disney nature film earth was playing and we figured this was a good start. very national geographic/mutual of omaha wild kingdom- esque. in other words, it had some educational value. the kids loved it, felt very special, and clearly paid close attention. it made a deep impact on both of them--the whole event of going to the theatre, getting popcorn, etc. very different from the tv.
of course as we were leaving, we walked past the other theatre where some very loud intense music was going on--carter was dying to know what it was, and i said "i think that is a scary movie" and both kids really wanted to peek in. over my vehement objections they ran to the door and pulled it open a crack--fortunately you cannot see the screen from that perspective -- and just as they got it about 4 inches open an absolutely deafening explosion of terrifying noise flew through that crack and into their surprised heads and they both turned around and ran away as fast as they could possibly get. i could not help but laugh -- though i kept the "i told you so!" to myself.
anna is 13 pounds, and still sniffling, though she has no idea that this is not normal. when she starts to feel better, i think she will be amazed at what breathing is actually like. she loves to talk--as soon as you appear in front of her, her face lights up and she just starts oooing and ahhing and now she is starting to squeal and laugh a bit. and she can face forwards in the bjorn, which is a treat for her as long as she is not sleepy. i always wonder if she knows she is next to me when she is facing that way though.
today it is supposed to be in the high 80s. woohoo! beach day!
now this dream is very interesting for a few reasons: first, he assumes that if he dreamt it, i have access to it in my head. obviously he is still working under the assumption that what he thinks i think. or, to put it more bluntly, that i can read his mind. this explains a lot.
second, i NEVER drive the boat. i am glad to hear that at least carter has the confidence in me to trust me with the controls.
third, wow, what a dream!
so then i asked him if he had other dreams that he remembered. "oh, yes! i have lots of dreams" he said. ava never shares her dreams, and i get the impression that although she keeps up a running audible commentary throughout the night, she does not ever remember her dreams. carter went on to tell me about the dragon in the cottage, but it was a baby dragon, otherwise it never would have fit in the cottage, as well as a really scary dream about an old man that was finished living in his body (an expression i have used when he asked me about dying), that could not die and underwent a particularly harrowing series of attempts at death. this one stopped me in my tracks because carter is so carefree and happy that it is very hard to imagine him having such an intense existential dream. there were a couple others that i cannot recall right now, but the entire conversation was very illuminating.
on saturday we all went to the movies for the fist time. the kids have been to several IMAX films, but never a feature length--the disney nature film earth was playing and we figured this was a good start. very national geographic/mutual of omaha wild kingdom- esque. in other words, it had some educational value. the kids loved it, felt very special, and clearly paid close attention. it made a deep impact on both of them--the whole event of going to the theatre, getting popcorn, etc. very different from the tv.
of course as we were leaving, we walked past the other theatre where some very loud intense music was going on--carter was dying to know what it was, and i said "i think that is a scary movie" and both kids really wanted to peek in. over my vehement objections they ran to the door and pulled it open a crack--fortunately you cannot see the screen from that perspective -- and just as they got it about 4 inches open an absolutely deafening explosion of terrifying noise flew through that crack and into their surprised heads and they both turned around and ran away as fast as they could possibly get. i could not help but laugh -- though i kept the "i told you so!" to myself.
anna is 13 pounds, and still sniffling, though she has no idea that this is not normal. when she starts to feel better, i think she will be amazed at what breathing is actually like. she loves to talk--as soon as you appear in front of her, her face lights up and she just starts oooing and ahhing and now she is starting to squeal and laugh a bit. and she can face forwards in the bjorn, which is a treat for her as long as she is not sleepy. i always wonder if she knows she is next to me when she is facing that way though.
today it is supposed to be in the high 80s. woohoo! beach day!
Saturday, May 09, 2009
ok, i finally have a moment to write about ava's skate competition. approximately 3 weeks ago, ava had her fist skating competition. the weeks that led up to it were filled with an unbelievable amount of parental stress that we tried desperately to hide from ava--between figuring out how to transfer a family of 5 one of whom was a newborn, plus a coach, plus assorted gear approximately 5 hours south for 3 days, and making sure ava was ready to actually compete, and trying to figure out for ourselves exactly what this would entail (not to mention fretting about the hotel room reservation, what the exact color of ava's tights should be, and remembering to buy bobby pins and hair nets, and worrying if ava would pull it off) we were sort of nervous. however, ava was not. she dutifully went to practice every day, and did her routine over and over and over again. the prep was rather intense for her, yet she never batted an eye. towards the end several of her peers atarted saying "i hope you win!...i hope you get a gold medal!...etc" and this created a bit of a snafu when ava internalized this and started pressuring herself. so we very quickly did some emergency sports psychology and intervened with our own mantras: this is supposed to be fun--that is the most important part--if you go out there, have fun, do everything you have been taught, then it will be a success. winning is not the point, and so on.
on the thursday before the competition, ava stayed home from school, and while carter was at pre-k, we loaded up our stuff. the kids and i left lake placid at 11 am, and moseyed on down to darien, ct, on the way picking up her coach at the albany airport. at 8 pm we arrived at the hotel. the 5-hour drive took us 9 hours, but it was accomplished without any major meltdowns. after a mandatory swim and dinner, the kids crashed at 10 pm. very late for them. like 3 hours late. and then at 6 am we were up, because the only practice ice was at 7 am. ava grumbled about it, but once she was on the ice, she was focused. she was out there with 25 other very big, very advanced skaters and she held her own, doing her spiral right through all of their spins nad jumps, never flinching. i, on the other hand, cannot watch that chaos. at least with riding, there is a set protocol as to who goes where--who takes the outside line, etc. here it is just a free for all. after about 20 minutes she was ready for swimming and breakfast so we headed home and got the most bizzare roomservice and nearly blinded the kids with the chlorine in the pool. it was a beautiful day so we went to the norwalk aquarium which was generally a success, but since the kids were so incredibly tired we had a few meltdowns here and there. nothing ice cream and chicken tenders couldn't fix. that afternoon nana arrived, and so we then had 3 adults for 3 children. a beautiful ratio. peter arrived later, after the kids had fallen asleep
early to bed and early to rise the next morning, and ava awoke with a very obvious sense of purpose. i did not have to ask her to do anything--we just got ready for the competition. we got to the arena, and ava and lorna headed off to get ready and get on the practice ice. ava never wavered--it was like she had done it a billion times before. carter, anna, peter and i went to the snack bar, where peter's nerves were obviously influencing him--he was an absolute bundle of tension, so i made every effort to find things to do. i figured leaving him alone was for the best. ava finished her practice, came off the ice, ate breakfast and got ready for the start of her first event. she was in the first event of the day, and ended up being the first skater too. they have a 5-minute warm up where the competitors all go out together, then they come off the ice and the first skater stays on to do her program. so, ava was literally the first skater on the new ice--as they announce the warm up, they announce the kids, and so ava was the first to step out, leading her group around the perimeter of the rink. here she was, at least 10 inches smaller than any of the other girls in her official lake placid jacket, leading the pack around. then they all dispersed to do their thing, and then it was time for ava to go. i was truly shaking with nerves. they announced her and she went to her spot in the rink, her music started and she did one of the most beautiful programs i have yet to see her do. and lo and behold, the audience clapped for her too! she hit every element, and was poised and beautiful. at the very end, right before her final spin she sat down, and yet she got right up again, finished her spin and her routine, curtseyed and was done. i could not believe how well she had done. she did not forget anything, she did everything very well, and was like a tiny professional. it was pretty obvious that the other skaters were more advanced than she was and that she would probably not place in the top 3, so we did not make a big deal out of results and just whisked everyone to the hotel to jump in the pool. after a long swim, a change of outfits and some lunch at wendy's, we went back to the competition. while she and lorna were getting ready, i snuck a peek at the results. she came in 6th, however, one of the judges had ranked her 1st. (how they figure out the final rankings is very confusing). i was beside myself with pride. so i ran off to tell lorna and let her tell ava--i was sure it would confuse her that she got a 1st from 1 judge but still did not get a medal. this really energized both of them, and they finished getting ready for ava's second event, "interpretive" -- this is a clever event, where the coaches are not allowed anywhere near the kids--all of the kids go on the ice and are presented with a piece of music chosen by the event staff. they hear it 2ce, and then they are all ushered off the ice. then they are put somewhere where they cannot see or hear the competition (in this case outside) and each skater comes in one by one and hears the music one more time before they go out on the ice and make up a routine to it. it is judged not on how many jumps etc the skater does, but how well they interpret the music. ava sat all the way on the other side of the rink, all by herself, and when she went on the ice for the first listen the song ended up being one that she had practiced to at home. this was superb. as she listened the first time, she did not skate--she just watched the other girls. then she started to put some stuff together for the second listen. then when it was her turn, she went out there and skated beautifully, doing one of the best spirals i have ever seen her do. she included all of the things lorna told her that she had to do (change of direction etc), and ended it exactly at the same time as the music. we erupted in cheers. 20 minutes later, they posted the results, and ava got 2nd place. so she medaled, got to stand on the podium, and was beside herself with pride.
by 4 pm, we loaded everyone into the cars, and by 10 pm we were home. with the help of several disney dvds...
it was a smashing success. when i asked her how she liked competing, she said "I LOVE IT."
on the thursday before the competition, ava stayed home from school, and while carter was at pre-k, we loaded up our stuff. the kids and i left lake placid at 11 am, and moseyed on down to darien, ct, on the way picking up her coach at the albany airport. at 8 pm we arrived at the hotel. the 5-hour drive took us 9 hours, but it was accomplished without any major meltdowns. after a mandatory swim and dinner, the kids crashed at 10 pm. very late for them. like 3 hours late. and then at 6 am we were up, because the only practice ice was at 7 am. ava grumbled about it, but once she was on the ice, she was focused. she was out there with 25 other very big, very advanced skaters and she held her own, doing her spiral right through all of their spins nad jumps, never flinching. i, on the other hand, cannot watch that chaos. at least with riding, there is a set protocol as to who goes where--who takes the outside line, etc. here it is just a free for all. after about 20 minutes she was ready for swimming and breakfast so we headed home and got the most bizzare roomservice and nearly blinded the kids with the chlorine in the pool. it was a beautiful day so we went to the norwalk aquarium which was generally a success, but since the kids were so incredibly tired we had a few meltdowns here and there. nothing ice cream and chicken tenders couldn't fix. that afternoon nana arrived, and so we then had 3 adults for 3 children. a beautiful ratio. peter arrived later, after the kids had fallen asleep
early to bed and early to rise the next morning, and ava awoke with a very obvious sense of purpose. i did not have to ask her to do anything--we just got ready for the competition. we got to the arena, and ava and lorna headed off to get ready and get on the practice ice. ava never wavered--it was like she had done it a billion times before. carter, anna, peter and i went to the snack bar, where peter's nerves were obviously influencing him--he was an absolute bundle of tension, so i made every effort to find things to do. i figured leaving him alone was for the best. ava finished her practice, came off the ice, ate breakfast and got ready for the start of her first event. she was in the first event of the day, and ended up being the first skater too. they have a 5-minute warm up where the competitors all go out together, then they come off the ice and the first skater stays on to do her program. so, ava was literally the first skater on the new ice--as they announce the warm up, they announce the kids, and so ava was the first to step out, leading her group around the perimeter of the rink. here she was, at least 10 inches smaller than any of the other girls in her official lake placid jacket, leading the pack around. then they all dispersed to do their thing, and then it was time for ava to go. i was truly shaking with nerves. they announced her and she went to her spot in the rink, her music started and she did one of the most beautiful programs i have yet to see her do. and lo and behold, the audience clapped for her too! she hit every element, and was poised and beautiful. at the very end, right before her final spin she sat down, and yet she got right up again, finished her spin and her routine, curtseyed and was done. i could not believe how well she had done. she did not forget anything, she did everything very well, and was like a tiny professional. it was pretty obvious that the other skaters were more advanced than she was and that she would probably not place in the top 3, so we did not make a big deal out of results and just whisked everyone to the hotel to jump in the pool. after a long swim, a change of outfits and some lunch at wendy's, we went back to the competition. while she and lorna were getting ready, i snuck a peek at the results. she came in 6th, however, one of the judges had ranked her 1st. (how they figure out the final rankings is very confusing). i was beside myself with pride. so i ran off to tell lorna and let her tell ava--i was sure it would confuse her that she got a 1st from 1 judge but still did not get a medal. this really energized both of them, and they finished getting ready for ava's second event, "interpretive" -- this is a clever event, where the coaches are not allowed anywhere near the kids--all of the kids go on the ice and are presented with a piece of music chosen by the event staff. they hear it 2ce, and then they are all ushered off the ice. then they are put somewhere where they cannot see or hear the competition (in this case outside) and each skater comes in one by one and hears the music one more time before they go out on the ice and make up a routine to it. it is judged not on how many jumps etc the skater does, but how well they interpret the music. ava sat all the way on the other side of the rink, all by herself, and when she went on the ice for the first listen the song ended up being one that she had practiced to at home. this was superb. as she listened the first time, she did not skate--she just watched the other girls. then she started to put some stuff together for the second listen. then when it was her turn, she went out there and skated beautifully, doing one of the best spirals i have ever seen her do. she included all of the things lorna told her that she had to do (change of direction etc), and ended it exactly at the same time as the music. we erupted in cheers. 20 minutes later, they posted the results, and ava got 2nd place. so she medaled, got to stand on the podium, and was beside herself with pride.
by 4 pm, we loaded everyone into the cars, and by 10 pm we were home. with the help of several disney dvds...
it was a smashing success. when i asked her how she liked competing, she said "I LOVE IT."
Friday, May 08, 2009
uhhh...let's see. anna went to her well-child visit on monday, she is 12.5 pounds and 24 inches, 88th percentile for weight, 95th for height--basically a butterball. and since she has carters structure, her buttery-ness is all in the middle, so she does look a bit like a ball when in her bouncy seat. it is very cute. everything else is fine, except that she does have a strawberry hemangioma on her eyelid. generally, a strawberry mark is not an issue, as they eventually go away, but often they grow fast before they go away, and in this case it could interfere w/ her eye opening. and thus it could interfere with her vision development. which means treating it with steroids. the doctor said "it seems like it is always the parents that are the least likely to be ok with steroids (ie crunchy no medicine organic-y folks) that are put in the position of having to use them." we are by no means in that position yet, but it is a possibility. currently it is wait and see.
ava had her second riding lesson, both kids adore the barn because it means free space to run around in, bunnies, cats, kittens, a pile of dirt and lots of trucks, and an 8-year old very happy to play with the kids.
riding and skating. great!
ava had her second riding lesson, both kids adore the barn because it means free space to run around in, bunnies, cats, kittens, a pile of dirt and lots of trucks, and an 8-year old very happy to play with the kids.
riding and skating. great!
Tuesday, May 05, 2009
carter is going to have his first playdate today. his friend is coming over after school, and will be here until i bring them both back to the school for elder-sibling pickup. it will be interesting. it is so nice though that he is finally not relegated to playing peripherally with ava's friends. because when that happens, ava is very quick to prove to her friend how much older she is. "oh, carter...why don't you go play with your helicopter or something? we have some important things to do..." or something like that. then she will turn to her friend and say "i love my brother and everything, but sometimes he is really annoying."
Friday, May 01, 2009
i think the experience of motherhood is nicely described by the following:
this evening, after changing anna's poopy diaper, i set about the task of clearing her nose, since she has caught the next round of viruses coming from kindergarten. as i bent over her, delicately pulling on a rather large, gooey booger so as to get it out intact, i paused and looked at her little nose, in particular her little teeny tiny absolutely perfect nostrils, and i was moved nearly to tears by the perfection and symmetry and incredible-ness that somehow these were created from just a tiny little bunch of cells, and for the millionth time i sat back and wondered at the magic of it.
and then i finished pulling the crusty bits out of her nose.
this evening, after changing anna's poopy diaper, i set about the task of clearing her nose, since she has caught the next round of viruses coming from kindergarten. as i bent over her, delicately pulling on a rather large, gooey booger so as to get it out intact, i paused and looked at her little nose, in particular her little teeny tiny absolutely perfect nostrils, and i was moved nearly to tears by the perfection and symmetry and incredible-ness that somehow these were created from just a tiny little bunch of cells, and for the millionth time i sat back and wondered at the magic of it.
and then i finished pulling the crusty bits out of her nose.
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